Being deprived of something makes us focus on something more important in life. The princess cakes can wait. The sweet potato fries can wait. The four cheese pizza can wait. Outings to IKEA can wait. Movie nights can wait. Breakfast dates can wait.
Sacrifice, sacrifice.
Posted in E.A.T, H.E.A.L.T.H, L.O.V.E
Because evidently, nothing beats the extra dollop of butter for the puff pastry.
…and there goes my so-called ‘anti-sugar’ diet.
Posted in E.A.T, H.E.A.L.T.H
A ‘junk’ foodie, I mean.
For the past years, I had been shying away from all these ‘junks’ or more like, I’ve put a permanent stop to consume it. But it’s hard to be that disciplined and control my ridiculous cravings, you know? I was never raised as a health nut, to start with. It just came to me for whatever reason and stuck to me like a parasite. Nobody in the family really count their calories and things like that, which makes it impossible for me to maintain my own position. So it gets a little crazy, you see? And after the phase of being very committed to a diet, my whole eating consumption turns a wee bit compulsive. And it is not even funny anymore.
I had the most brilliant idea just now to pair this dry, dark cholcolate ‘cake’ with a super artificial marshmallow cream with low fat milk. At least something has to done to make it a wholesome snack, yes? Plus point for the milk.
And now, my tummy is making some sort of weird rumbles and my head is getting heavier. Am I really that prone to junk? That is a question that will remain unanswered.
Do I feel bad about it? Yeah, I do. I’ve always had this feeling of not being able to accept my body. Too small at this part, too big at this part; I never give too much thought on it, because I know it’ll always bring some degree of disappointment . Will I be better off if I never had that piece of macadamia cheesecake and those wagyu beef sandwiches at 10pm? Probably.
I tried to top my dancing class again, but I barely can’t now. Everybody’s moving so damn fast and I got tired pretty easily and my mind just can’t grasp the copious steps like how I used to. (plus everyone is so damn pretty and fit and ughhhhhh).
And with that, I need a plan.
Posted in E.A.T, H.E.A.L.T.H
*mike check mike check*
HELLO THE NAME IS M AND I AM OFFICIALLY A REBORN FRIED FOOD ADDICT THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!
This thing is oily, crunchy and doughy. Slightly bigger and fatter than a piece of churros. Too perfect for a girl like me. Nauseating at first, but perfect to give me temporary high anytime.
Posted in E.A.T, H.E.A.L.T.H
There is a fine line between staying committed with your job and being committed with your body. For obvious reasons, the latter seems to overrule.
And as I am typing this, I want you to know that I had this in mind last night with my sister stepping on my back from all those damn waitressing job. Partially because I can’t afford any form of Thai massage at the moment, and also because I was feeling quite ancient lately with the excruciating contractions of my calf muscles and the ones on my upper back. Seriously, I am not being a baby.
I look up to those exceptional people who serves us at the restaurant. If you think that you want to try to deal with your big ego, take some waitressing jobs. I promise you that you’ll remain humble for the rest of your life.
Posted in H.E.A.L.T.H
I guess I am never comfortable with the way I look, the way I dress and how my hair is. I guess I just don’t. I don’t quite like my hips, neither my calves and I don’t like my midriff, as it reminds me to the days of me being a fat kid. But when Lady Gaga came into my life, she had opened up to me, another realm of possibility and thought me that no matter what people say about you, you just gotta keep on pushing. But I still can’t, up to this day. I want my confidence to come back to me in real life, like how it hugs me when I am doing a play, etc.
They say beauty comes from within. Well, I don’t feel pretty. At all.
All these shenanigans that happened in my life prior to this stage are the reason why I don’t trust people too much. I can never understand the degree of truthfulness that comes out from their mouths. I can’t register the fact that how they complimented me and all that. Because it feels like those words are not meant for me. I see Lady Gaga dresses herself to the extreme, showing the world the other persona that she want people to see about her, and I feel like I can engage to that feeling ultimately. That is why I want to live my life as an actress.
So I could be anyone but me.
Posted in H.E.A.L.T.H, L.I.F.E
So what it seems like forever, freaking out and being scared that yours truly might get diabetes, everything was put to an end yesterday with some random blood test my fellow doctor-in-the-making friend brought me to. I freaked out as usual, not to forget the obligatory nervousness of foreseeing some bad news coming at me. But God is great, (for making me feel bad of myself in becoming a self-induced sugarholic) so yesterday’s result made me learn something. In one word : detox.
Posted in H.E.A.L.T.H
